194. Two Years from Boston

I moved back to Minnesota on July 13, 2014. Facebook fortunately reminded me of the date. I miss Boston a lot. I miss the friends I made. I miss being in a place where things felt like they were happening. I miss Improv Boston. I miss walking for miles without feeling lost.

I met a friend from high school for drinks this afternoon. I hadn’t seen him in a couple years. We caught up about our careers, love lives, and general feelings about the world. We both agreed that we have changed a lot since high school. I think people, at least the healthy ones, change every few years. There were times where I thought Boston was the end game. I was going to be there for the rest of my life. While I think i could have made that work, I am so happy to be back in my home state.

I’ve lost that general sense of dread that hung over my head while I was in Boston. While I had a head full of steam for my goals, there was a sense that I wasn’t quite sure I knew what I was doing. While my job at the Herald wasn’t the most glamorous, I’m glad I had that short time there. I learned a lot. I met cool people (a few of whom I’m still in touch with) and I got a better sense of what i wanted to do and what I didn’t. It was clear that I didn’t have the support network to make that job work. It’s hard to work till 2 a.m. for meager pay. I’m in a better place now.

I’m not sure I’d be able to go back just yet. When I say goodbye to people or places, there is a part of my mind that shuts down to them. I think that may be for protection. I need to have that ending to keep on with my life. Even though that feels sort of silly for a place, it doesn’t feel like time to go back just yet.

I took a lot of things from Boston. I still have an affinity for the city and its sports teams. I still root for the Red Sox. I hate Deflategate and all the dumb crap that has come out of it, but I like seeing the Patriots win.

Boston taught me to be more self-reliant. It forced me into my first real big financial decision in grad school. It forced me to set out on my own in a place where I knew no body. I found housing, friends, a community. I had to build a life there with little to no specific support network. I made some lifelong friends, ignited a passion for writing and journalism, and found a great community within comedy. It was the first place outside of Minnesota where I planted a stake of ownership in. I was there for the Marathon Bombing, the Whitey Bulger Trial, the Aaron Hernandez murder, a mayoral race, a Red Sox World Series win,  and a bunch of other things. Those things inspired some pride for Beantown.

I miss Boston. I miss it a lot. There are times when I wish I was still there. Although, I’m glad I took a lot of things from there. I learned a lot. I did a lot. And I charted a good course for myself. Boston, I’ll see you again someday.